Jerry, you need to find god
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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