Just cropdusted the office
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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