Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
