They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Randomize
