Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
