Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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