So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
