I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Randomize
