...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
