wakey wakey hands off snakey
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
