I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I think I just sharted jello shots
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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