Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Too much gin, very little bucket
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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