Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
