Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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