i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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