spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
