Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
