Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
