He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
