ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
It's just like the Real World with babies
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Terrible idea I love it
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize
