What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
