Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Randomize
