I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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