I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
two words: eviction party
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
