i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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