went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
