Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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