We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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