normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
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