sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
