i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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