good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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