You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
this hospital has no fireball
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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