i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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