If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
