didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Randomize
