we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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