I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
