I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
