found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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