There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
