Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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