That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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