so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
