went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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