Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
