I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
