I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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