I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
