it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Randomize
